There are times that I don't mind writing or talking about myself, but being a basically very private person after I've had my say I tend to clam up and even regret what I've said...I'm sure some will say that this is a psychological problem, and one of those strange traits that often go with being an artist. And this is partly true, but it also has some kind of complex cause/effect relationship having to do with my view of reality.
Back in my "Yahoo blogs" (which are now available for viewing at tomhawkrevisited.blospot.com), I took on the subject of "words" as poor tools for describing reality. I used the example from geometry of trying to describe a sphere using only straight lines.
I also said that unlike many writers who have a passion for words, my involvement more closely resembled a WAR with words where my skill was learned from battling with them trying to make them accurately resemble reality...And this is more art than skill, since one must put into play more of the subtle connotations of language to give you a feeling rather than just using a word in a stricter sense. It is a double-edged sword, however, since when you tread in that territory your meanings will become lost to many...a fertile ground for misunderstanding.
So in my short bio, as in other writings, not only is there much that is left out, but I always come away with the feeling that I have not told the whole truth. It's a bad feeling, almost as if I've lied. This tends to make me feel uncommunicative for a time.
While it's true that I do enjoy getting out & meeting the public now & then, I really am not comfortable as a "public figure". I enjoy producing my art in solitude, and in fact it's necessary to the creative process. But even were I not an artist, I am a contemplative type of person and could easily see myself as a monk or other ascetic sort of hermit.
And this is why my music isn't for everyone. I've always tended to write in popular styles. I've always worked to make my music and lyrics accessible to everyone, avoiding the avant-garde.The concepts behind my work tend to be about things that are universally relatable. So why aren't I more popular (I mean besides lack of exposure)?
I believe the answer lies in my personality. I have studied what makes other artists popular and have detected a real difference. It seems that the average audience craves excitement (I avoid excitement and crave peace). They want to see someone who breaks down barriers, where I am patiently building bridges. They want to dig into the guts of things, while I am trying to ascend to the mountaintop. So it seems I differ from the vast majority who find success and those who bestow it.
I am not complaining, just stating the situation as it appears to me. To twist an old axiom: "I'd rather be ignored for who I am, than mistakenly loved for who I am not." ....Peace and Best Wishes....TomHawk
Friday, January 28, 2011
Friday, January 21, 2011
"What's my style?"
Like all musicians I have been asked the question repeatedly by the general public, "So what type of music do you play ?". This is understandable since being on the receiving end of music production, they are used to being fed music in neat classifications, or else organizing styles & genres in their minds in order to relate different artists to what they already know. And many in the music business purposely limit themselves by using the trappings of a "known style" in order to make their musical identity more defined.
But this question has always stopped me in my tracks. Even when I think of a good reply, it tends to desert me the moment it's needed and I wind up stammering, or come up with some lame descriptive term. That's because on my end, things are very different.
Before we get into my methods of creation, perhaps I should explain my musical background and influences. As mentioned before, in grade school we were given an extensive musical history and made familiar with so-called "classical" composers, and they became my early heroes. I had already seen the Beatles and had been greatly excited by their music, but was otherwise unaware of contemporary popular and Top-40 for a number of years yet.
Also, I absorbed a lot of popular music from the 20's & 30's from various sources. It wasn't until Jr. High that I found a radio in someones trash and brought it home, that I was astounded by what was going on musically. This was around the begining groundswell of the singer-songwriter movement, and I was never quite the same.
The first tunes I began to play when learning guitar were old folk tunes, since that's what the instruction books came with because they were simple to play. I soon graduated to figuring out Beatle tunes. Or deciphering old sheet music of Beethoven et al on the piano. Somehow this division continued for quite a while; guitar for popular, keyboards for classical (and wishing I could get a harpsichord as I loved the sound).
Before long I began to compose melodies of my own, at first with no harmonies, or later, with simple two-part accompaniment.
Later, a book I aquired on how to play blues guitar, and a fascination with the roots of Led Zeppelin's influences led me to a long standing interest in playing blues. Senior year I ran across the opportunity to explore more of John Denver's work, and retraced his folk background which led me to some interesting stuff.
To make a very long story short, these and other styles gradually came to merge together to where I never really saw a division between them...it was ALL music.
So anytime I have the opportunity to play covers, anything might happen: Depression-era blues, old C&W, 50's folk or pop, music of the 60's, a few choice artists from the 80' s or 90's....or of course my old stand-bys, singer-songwriter material.
Being a writer who receives his songs by inspiration, I have little control over what I write apart from to accept or reject an idea that comes. Often the tune itself will tell me what kind of style it wants to be "clothed" in. Or else I will choose elements of a particular style that seems to present the song in it's best light. So there are cases in which I have to limit instrumentation or the voicings in the arrangements to try to make it fit in a chosen style, but only if it enhances the tune. Many, probably most of my works are made with any elements that seem to heighten the tunes direction and meaning, often borrowed from different styles or no style at all!
So, "What kind of music do you play?" is still an unanswerable question, eclectic as it is. This first album is a conglomerate of acoustic styles with interlocking/interwoven themes, which is how they wound up together. But the next album will likely have darker, more electric themes and maybe some lighter tunes and more jazz influence, but other influences will show as well.
But this question has always stopped me in my tracks. Even when I think of a good reply, it tends to desert me the moment it's needed and I wind up stammering, or come up with some lame descriptive term. That's because on my end, things are very different.
Before we get into my methods of creation, perhaps I should explain my musical background and influences. As mentioned before, in grade school we were given an extensive musical history and made familiar with so-called "classical" composers, and they became my early heroes. I had already seen the Beatles and had been greatly excited by their music, but was otherwise unaware of contemporary popular and Top-40 for a number of years yet.
Also, I absorbed a lot of popular music from the 20's & 30's from various sources. It wasn't until Jr. High that I found a radio in someones trash and brought it home, that I was astounded by what was going on musically. This was around the begining groundswell of the singer-songwriter movement, and I was never quite the same.
The first tunes I began to play when learning guitar were old folk tunes, since that's what the instruction books came with because they were simple to play. I soon graduated to figuring out Beatle tunes. Or deciphering old sheet music of Beethoven et al on the piano. Somehow this division continued for quite a while; guitar for popular, keyboards for classical (and wishing I could get a harpsichord as I loved the sound).
Before long I began to compose melodies of my own, at first with no harmonies, or later, with simple two-part accompaniment.
Later, a book I aquired on how to play blues guitar, and a fascination with the roots of Led Zeppelin's influences led me to a long standing interest in playing blues. Senior year I ran across the opportunity to explore more of John Denver's work, and retraced his folk background which led me to some interesting stuff.
To make a very long story short, these and other styles gradually came to merge together to where I never really saw a division between them...it was ALL music.
So anytime I have the opportunity to play covers, anything might happen: Depression-era blues, old C&W, 50's folk or pop, music of the 60's, a few choice artists from the 80' s or 90's....or of course my old stand-bys, singer-songwriter material.
Being a writer who receives his songs by inspiration, I have little control over what I write apart from to accept or reject an idea that comes. Often the tune itself will tell me what kind of style it wants to be "clothed" in. Or else I will choose elements of a particular style that seems to present the song in it's best light. So there are cases in which I have to limit instrumentation or the voicings in the arrangements to try to make it fit in a chosen style, but only if it enhances the tune. Many, probably most of my works are made with any elements that seem to heighten the tunes direction and meaning, often borrowed from different styles or no style at all!
So, "What kind of music do you play?" is still an unanswerable question, eclectic as it is. This first album is a conglomerate of acoustic styles with interlocking/interwoven themes, which is how they wound up together. But the next album will likely have darker, more electric themes and maybe some lighter tunes and more jazz influence, but other influences will show as well.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Some observations...and more of "what's up?"
I am aware that I regularly drop self-deprecating comments as to my musicianship. Anyone might end up thinking that I regard myself as a poor musician, but this is NOT the case so I feel the need for a deeper explanation.
Early in life, I actually stood out from my peers in regards to musical ability. It also didn't hurt that I was fortunate enough to grow up in a school system where they taught everyone how to read music from the FIRST GRADE!
I continued high in musical ranking & knowledge thru high school, mainly because I lived music even in my off hours and obsessed over it, wanting to learn as much as I could. But even so, it really wasn't that I worked at it. As I say, I was obsessed and it didn't really feel like work.
That said, you couldn't really say I tried hard, or I would have learned much more. I was used to being sort of musically gifted.
So attending Berklee College of Music was a real eye-opener. It began on my first day of orientation when I was auditioned for placement in the guitar program...where they basically told me that I "didn't know how to play"...and ranked me to start at the bottom.
The reason for this assessment was that being self-taught, I didn't use conventional fingerings, but my own style I had made up (including using the thumb to finger bass-notes). I played everything they asked me to play, could sight-read easily, etc.
It didn't stop there...I met and listened to many guitar players who had taken their instruments very seriously indeed for many years and realized I was way out-classed. But also I met many who couldn't yet read music, could play very basic guitar but not cleanly, but who had come to learn.
So I am being realistic from my point of view. I know where I stand. I am not a gifted guitar player. I will never have virtuosity to set me apart, because I seem to be wired with a slow nervous system-muscle interface which does not allow for the facility to play really fast runs, even when I can envision them. And I have never regarded myself as a great singer from the begining. I sing out of necessity, because I am the only one who has the enthusiasm for my work to do so. (I am a product of the singer-songwriter movement, but that's another tale).
No, my strength lies in one thing only: The songs. There have been many great songs written, and I can always spot inspired work a mile away. While I do appreciate any tune that arises from great talent, inspired work is my favorite and the basis of my own writing, for which I am happy and grateful.
Someday I will go into my thoughts on where I think these songs come from and their nature. But let's just leave it there for now....
Now just a short note on what else has happened in the recent past, as far as performing.
As a side note, another reason I feel I made a good host for open-mike night was the fact that I knew so many songs. I had stopped counting when I had learned about 300 cover versions and had picked up quite a few since then. Not that I did all of them well. But I was really put to the test to pick out and rehearse different tunes from that bunch month after month. Many of our performers only knew a handful of tunes and would have to repeat them frequently.
Anyway, also during that period, I became involved with a Variety Show put on in conjunction with a local stage company. The purpose was both to showcase talent from the area and to raise money for a scholarship fund to help out a local young artist. I was proud to be involved. I auditioned and then performed a cover of a Don McLean tune which was well-received.
We had performers of every stripe, singers, dancers, poetry, drama, bands, even a few lip-syncers.
The PA system worked OK for some acts, but was sub-par for others causing complications. The next year I volunteered mine as a supplement to help out. I was permitted to do 2 tunes, and so having completed my first album "CFlight" by then, I chose originals. I reworked the recordings for mono, remastered with no vocals, to be played on the house PA while I performed on my own.
They seemed well-received (I did "Images of Maine" & "Earthwind") but I wonder to this day how many people thought I was lip-syncing due to the pre-recorded music!
It was after this that life-changes tore me away from involvement in this fun and worthwhile event and I haven't gotten back since, sadly.
Early in life, I actually stood out from my peers in regards to musical ability. It also didn't hurt that I was fortunate enough to grow up in a school system where they taught everyone how to read music from the FIRST GRADE!
I continued high in musical ranking & knowledge thru high school, mainly because I lived music even in my off hours and obsessed over it, wanting to learn as much as I could. But even so, it really wasn't that I worked at it. As I say, I was obsessed and it didn't really feel like work.
That said, you couldn't really say I tried hard, or I would have learned much more. I was used to being sort of musically gifted.
So attending Berklee College of Music was a real eye-opener. It began on my first day of orientation when I was auditioned for placement in the guitar program...where they basically told me that I "didn't know how to play"...and ranked me to start at the bottom.
The reason for this assessment was that being self-taught, I didn't use conventional fingerings, but my own style I had made up (including using the thumb to finger bass-notes). I played everything they asked me to play, could sight-read easily, etc.
It didn't stop there...I met and listened to many guitar players who had taken their instruments very seriously indeed for many years and realized I was way out-classed. But also I met many who couldn't yet read music, could play very basic guitar but not cleanly, but who had come to learn.
So I am being realistic from my point of view. I know where I stand. I am not a gifted guitar player. I will never have virtuosity to set me apart, because I seem to be wired with a slow nervous system-muscle interface which does not allow for the facility to play really fast runs, even when I can envision them. And I have never regarded myself as a great singer from the begining. I sing out of necessity, because I am the only one who has the enthusiasm for my work to do so. (I am a product of the singer-songwriter movement, but that's another tale).
No, my strength lies in one thing only: The songs. There have been many great songs written, and I can always spot inspired work a mile away. While I do appreciate any tune that arises from great talent, inspired work is my favorite and the basis of my own writing, for which I am happy and grateful.
Someday I will go into my thoughts on where I think these songs come from and their nature. But let's just leave it there for now....
Now just a short note on what else has happened in the recent past, as far as performing.
As a side note, another reason I feel I made a good host for open-mike night was the fact that I knew so many songs. I had stopped counting when I had learned about 300 cover versions and had picked up quite a few since then. Not that I did all of them well. But I was really put to the test to pick out and rehearse different tunes from that bunch month after month. Many of our performers only knew a handful of tunes and would have to repeat them frequently.
Anyway, also during that period, I became involved with a Variety Show put on in conjunction with a local stage company. The purpose was both to showcase talent from the area and to raise money for a scholarship fund to help out a local young artist. I was proud to be involved. I auditioned and then performed a cover of a Don McLean tune which was well-received.
We had performers of every stripe, singers, dancers, poetry, drama, bands, even a few lip-syncers.
The PA system worked OK for some acts, but was sub-par for others causing complications. The next year I volunteered mine as a supplement to help out. I was permitted to do 2 tunes, and so having completed my first album "CFlight" by then, I chose originals. I reworked the recordings for mono, remastered with no vocals, to be played on the house PA while I performed on my own.
They seemed well-received (I did "Images of Maine" & "Earthwind") but I wonder to this day how many people thought I was lip-syncing due to the pre-recorded music!
It was after this that life-changes tore me away from involvement in this fun and worthwhile event and I haven't gotten back since, sadly.
Monday, January 10, 2011
So, what's happened lately???
In the last few years I have sort of dropped out of sight, as far as public performance is concerned. This is a matter of great regret for me. For while I have always considered myself primarily a "recording artist", it has always been important part of the equation for me to get out there and meet the public.
Before life's obligations and family changes overwhelmed, I was doing some local performing. For about a year and a half, I was involved in a local open mike night. Most of that time, I was hosting the events. How this came about was unexpected.
I read about this gathering in the local paper, and it took awhile to both get up the nerve and get myself oriented to try to attend. I don't remember if I even brought my guitar the first time.
I do remember, the first time I had it with me there was a snowstorm, and the only attendees were the cafe's owner, the host, myself and my wife.
We listened while he played a few tunes, and he encouraged me to join in. I played a couple and he jammed along, but I was nervous and never really got comfortable that first time. The second time the host was absent, attendance was sparse, but I managed to get up and play a tune after a performance by the "substitute" host, a self-confessed sufferer of stage-fright.
By the third time, neither host showed and I was elected host, a position I held for over a year. Gradually other artists who apparently had been there before and attended sporadically began to attend and I made their aquaintance.
So my impression is that I got the job, not because I was the best musician there, but merely because I could be counted on to show up every time. The usual format was that I would get up and perform a set, each other artist would play a few tunes, then I would perform again inviting the others to play and sing along.
Attendance was never steady, but we had a good number of times with plenty of talented artists and a full house in attendance. Many good times were had!
Next time, I will relate other performing experiences from the same period of time....
Before life's obligations and family changes overwhelmed, I was doing some local performing. For about a year and a half, I was involved in a local open mike night. Most of that time, I was hosting the events. How this came about was unexpected.
I read about this gathering in the local paper, and it took awhile to both get up the nerve and get myself oriented to try to attend. I don't remember if I even brought my guitar the first time.
I do remember, the first time I had it with me there was a snowstorm, and the only attendees were the cafe's owner, the host, myself and my wife.
We listened while he played a few tunes, and he encouraged me to join in. I played a couple and he jammed along, but I was nervous and never really got comfortable that first time. The second time the host was absent, attendance was sparse, but I managed to get up and play a tune after a performance by the "substitute" host, a self-confessed sufferer of stage-fright.
By the third time, neither host showed and I was elected host, a position I held for over a year. Gradually other artists who apparently had been there before and attended sporadically began to attend and I made their aquaintance.
So my impression is that I got the job, not because I was the best musician there, but merely because I could be counted on to show up every time. The usual format was that I would get up and perform a set, each other artist would play a few tunes, then I would perform again inviting the others to play and sing along.
Attendance was never steady, but we had a good number of times with plenty of talented artists and a full house in attendance. Many good times were had!
Next time, I will relate other performing experiences from the same period of time....
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